Many times I’ve been struck by l'esprit d’escalier – literally “staircase wit”, meaning to think of the perfect thing to say when you’re on the stairs leaving the situation. I’ll replay a situation in my head for weeks or even months afterwards, trying to think of the perfect remark to cut someone down to size after they’ve been rude. But, now, a woman in the US has shown that for every shitty action there’s an equal and opposite reaction that’s far more effective than a well-placed insult could ever be.
Vega Blossom, a 19-year-old woman from Indiana, had seen that a local bakery was having a sale, so went down to pick up some delicious cut-price confectionery. While standing in a queue, she heard the two women standing behind her say, “Let’s hope this fat bitch doesn’t buy all the cupcakes.”
Cupcakes are sweet, but revenge is sweeter
If that was me, I would have died on the inside. I would have tried my hardest to pretend I hadn’t heard them, bought about a third of the cake I’d originally come in to buy and sloped off to cry in my car. Vega, however, is a better woman than me. She didn’t say anything to the woman who had been so rude; she just calmly waited until it was her turn to be served and bought every single cupcake in the shop. Every. Single. One. She spent $54 (about £38) on them, just to get back at the women who’d called her names.
And then, on her way out, she asked them to hold the door open for her. Cupcakes are sweet, but revenge is sweeter
There are many times in my life I’ve overheard someone being mean about me and wished I’d said something. Many times I wished I’d stood up for myself when someone was being unkind or undermining me, but instead kept my mouth shut and let them get away with it out of fear of embarrassing myself or causing a scene. The next time, I am channelling Vega. I won’t start an argument and I won’t insult them back, because, in the words of Michelle Obama, when they go low, we go high. I’ll stand tall, I’ll wait my turn, I’ll buy all the freaking cupcakes in the shop. Perfect. Vega, we salute you.