Advice

Dear Viv: I've lost my friends to parenthood

On this week's podcast, Viv discusses what to do when your friends are only interested in their babies

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By Viv Groskop on

DEAR VIV,

The majority of my friends have recently had babies and we seem to no longer have anything in common. I emigrated to the UK some years ago, so these friends were my stronghold and meant so much but now they are absent.

When we do meet, they spend their time talking about their children, checking their phone for updates or talking about all the things they do with their NCT friends (sometimes six months in advance). I'm seldom asked what I've been doing etc, but when I do, I get a lot of envy or comments along the lines of "enjoy it while you can...".

I recently lost a parent and no one said anything or offered support.

Is it OK for me to boycott these friends that are no longer bringing much to the relationship, or am I morally obliged to wait for them to come out of the baby bubble? And what do I do in the meantime? I've signed up to various nightclasses but it's hard to replace old friends and so life gets a bit lonely.

Love,
Fed up

Got a question for Viv? Email her at DearViv@thepoolltd.com. The Dear Viv podcast airs weekly on The Pool at 5pm on Tuesdays. All letters will be edited for length. Unfortunately Viv cannot reply to your emails personally. 

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