Dear Viv: My partner's mum wants me to be an overbearing landlord

On this week's podcast, Viv discusses what to do when you disagree with your partner's mother

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By Viv Groskop on

Dear Viv,

I want to start by saying I really like my partner's mum, "Lucy". She is an incredible woman who has done some amazing things in her life and has many skills I massively admire. I recently moved into a property on her land as the sole tenant and she has supported me through a really difficult time, which I am immensely grateful for. I decided to stay and take on the building as manager. 

The problem is, Lucy wants control over her tenants in ways that I am uncomfortable with. She wants the building to remain drink and drug free, but when I think about having to enforce this, I start to get very anxious. I do not drink regularly or do any drugs at home, but what gives her the right to tell tenants what they can and cannot put into their bodies? Perhaps this hits a sore spot for me as I've had overbearing landlords in the past. The space is already not that nice a place to live due to general disrepair, and I feel that this policy just makes it worse. I can't imagine anyone wanting to pay to stay here with the state it is in at the moment.

My partner thinks I should be honest with the rules in adverts etc, but then tell people in person that they can do what they want as long as they are subtle about it. I don't know how comfortable I am with that.

Got a question for Viv? Email her at The Dear Viv podcast airs weekly on The Pool at 5pm on Tuesdays. All letters will be edited for length. Unfortunately Viv cannot reply to your emails personally. 

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