Someone literally baked an arse on Great Danish Bake Off

Denmark's version of Bake Off has sparked major controversy after its "macho" challenge week

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By Caroline O'Donoghue on

I've often wondered what it must have been like to be alive during the fall of Rome, but having lived through the last few weeks of Bake Off, I feel like I now have a pretty good idea. This is what it must look like when a great empire grows so large that it gradually begins to crush in on itself. There's trouble in the Senate – I'm pretty sure Mary Berry is still glaring at Paul Hollywood and whispering "Et tu, Brute?" as he gallops off to Channel 4 – and there's trouble in the colonies. The trusted Bake Off formula that seemed to work so seamlessly for the UK has settled uneasily in foreign climes.

What am I talking about? I am talking about Denmark. I am talking about the Great Danish Bake Off, or as it's called in the Google translated news stories I have been poring over all morning, "the large baking contest".  This week, flour fans were treated to "macho" challenges. The Signature Bake was bread-focused because that's what MEN do, isn't it? Men bake things with RYE and WHEAT and brawny spoonfuls of yeast. Only real men mess with yeast, because if a woman touches it she'll get an infection and her vulva will turn to sand. 

But the true tour-de-force of the large baking contest was the Showstopper Challenge, where bakers were challenged to create a cake for a stag party.  The cake would have to show each baker's interpretation of the theme "macho". Let me repeat that: Bake Off, the cheery show in which soft-handed apron-wearing lovelies bake companionably in a tent, asked its contestants to make a sexy cake for a stag party. In Denmark. 

Gunnar Weis Reinhardt, a 35-year-old gay man, created his interpretation of "macho" by showing feet under a blanket on top of a champagne-flavoured heart cake. 

In a decidedly un-Bake Off challenge, this is as close to a Bake Off cake as you can get. At least, by Sue and Mel's standards. However, Gunnar was then eliminated from the show, with the judges questioning his understanding of the concept of masculinity. 

Once again, Bake Off, the ultra-inclusive sugarfest and – until recently – the jewel in Britain's cultural crown, criticised a gay men for not understanding masculinity. Below is a picture of the cake that did deserve the judges' praise. 

Yup. A g-string, a garter and Playboy bunny tattoo. On a cake. On Bake Off. 

Put coins on this show's eyes and get ready to send it down the Tiber, everyone. The Empire has fallen, and while it was nice while it lasted, nothing can last forever. There's no Sue, no Mel, no Mary. Just Paul Hollywood, and ass cakes. 


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Great British Bakeoff

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